Marrow

the answer came 
like a shot in the back 
while you were running from your lesson, 
which might explain 
why years later
all you could remember 
was the terror of the question. 
plus, you weren't listening, 
you were stockpiling canned goods 
and making a bomb shelter of our basement. 
and i can't believe 
you let the moral go by 
while you were soaking 
in the product placement. 


and where was your conscience? 
where was your consciousness? 
and where did you put all those letters 
that you wrote to yourself 
but could not address? 


yeah, i'm a good kisser, 
and you're a fast learner, 
and that kind of thing could float us 
for a pretty long time. 
and then one day,  you'd realize 
you've memorized my phone number,
and you'll call it and find it's a disconnected line. cuz i got tossed out the window of love's el camino and i shattered into a shower of sparks on the curb. you were smoking me weren't you between your yellow fingers, you just inhaled and exhaled without saying a word. where was your conscience? where was your consciousness? and what did you do with all those letters you wrote to yourself but could not address? there's a smorgasbord of unspoken poisons,
a whole childhood of potions that are all bottled up, and so one by one i am dusting off labels, i am uncorking bottles and i am filling up cups. go ahead and have a taste of your own medicine. here i'll have a taste of mine,
but first lets toast to the lists that we hold in our fists of the things that we promised to do differently next time. cuz the answer came, like a shot in the back while you ran from your lesson which might explain why years later all you could remember was the terror of the question. cause i'm not listening
to you anymore. my head is too sore and my heart's perforated and i am mired in the marrow of my
"well ain't that funny?" bone, learning how to be alone and devastated. where was my conscience? where was my consciousness?
and where
do i put all these letters that i wrote to myself but could not address? -Ani DiFranco